The Unbearable Weight of Grief

When tragedy struck my family, I felt a disorienting and unendurable grief. Friends and loved ones offered expressions meant to support me, but instead, they often made me want want to scream! I heard well meaning friends and family say, “Time heals all wounds,” “You need to find closure”, or the most disappointing, “Let’s visit when you are feeling better.” Even though their efforts missed the target, deep down I knew they were well intended. Other expressions and actions were spot on. They lifted my heart, just enough to let me know that I was cared for, understood and loved. In this writing, I share experiences and insights from my mourning process, highlighting the more common dynamics and challenges, and sharing those strategies that helped me cope with the unbearable weight of my grief and eventually, laugh and dance with it.